Author Archives: laurencereade

Epicentre

25 Sunday Sep 2011

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Saturday 24th September 2011 ko 10.30am

North Berkshire League Division 2

STEVENTON 3 (Margetts 7 McArdle 18 Cooper 69)

MARCHAM 2 (Northcott 15 Banks 33)

Att 190

Entry by Programme £3

Badge £3

Tea and Bacon Roll £2.50

The North Berkshire League hop had been over a year in the making, and as organiser its never easy bringing a league and its clubs up to speed on what to expect and how to go about making the most of the day. The league were, and are a pleasure to deal with, but you never know…. until the coach drove past Steventon Green for the pick up at Didcot station , and there was the barbeque fired up, the pitch roped off and the the hoppers already tucking in.

I’d picked Steventon because of the league rule that all grounds have to be within 20 miles of Steventon Green, so why not start at the centre of things!

Raffle tickets were sold, the programmes sold out, and people enjoyed a cracking game, in the autumnal sun. Neither side seemed capable of defending which believe me hoppers love!  I’ve never met a hopper would didn’t like goals!!!

I did hear a lovely comment from one visitor when we announced the attendance, ” I bet that’s double what they normally get!” Little did they know, when I first visited Steventon FC, the attendance was 7!

I climbed back aboard the bus, knowing things were all going to work out nicely. Thanks guys!

The A3 Derby

22 Thursday Sep 2011

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Combined Counties League Premier Division

COLLIERS WOOD UNITED 1 (Davies 4)

HANWORTH VILLA 4 (Oakes 22 58 Preddie 43 Farnden 45)

Att 62

Entry £6

Programme £1

How many motorists have driven north along the A3 from the M25 and passed the ground not noticing the delights to be found at the Wibbandune Sports Ground, to their right? It really is a great little club to visit, once you’ve worked out how to park! The clever move is to park opposite and use the footbridge over the dual carriageway.

A friendly welcome awaits, as I discovered after a beast of a journey. I’d avoided the jams on the M25 and driven via Sheen and Kingston and got to the ground a full 30 seconds before kickoff. Nevertheless a programme was found, after a promise that if one couldn’t be found they’d print me one off. At half time I enjoyed a conversation about Queen’s Park FC.

The lineups were displayed on a blackboard, and updated with scorers and substitutions. Plenty for the student of the non league stadium with the quirky overhang to the clubhouse and the display of classic pitch rollers! Yes, there’s the Arena stand, to keep Colliers Wood at step 5, but it hasn’t ruined the feel of the place.

Sadly step 5 looks to be the height of the club’s ambitions at this ground. There’s a public footpath, it’s in no way enclosed and having a river at one end does mean games do get regularly waterlogged off.

On the pitch too Wood look a long way from  progressing further, despite Davies’ 35 yard blockbuster to open the scoring. From then on in their local rivals were always in control, and sadly for my excellent hosts, 1-4 was a fair reflection on the game.

I wholeheartly recommend a trip to this friendly little club, but do check if there’s been rain.

Mobile Teeth Whitening

22 Thursday Sep 2011

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Leicestershire Senior League Premier Division

ASHBY IVANHOE 2 (Willars 64 Chambers 90og)

BIRSTALL UNITED 4 (Seals 4 Man-Keil 37 Headly 71 Raye 84) Williamson sent off 50 (2nd booking)

Att 37 (h/c)

Entry FREE

No programme

Cheese/Bacon Burger £3

Tea 65p  from a mobile van

Hood Park is not the most exciting of venues, tucked away behind a leisure centre, like an embarrassment. The generator for the floodlights spluttered into life and occasionally belched a dark cloud into the dark skies. No cover save for the overhang of the leisure centre, and nothing to eat except from the burger van whose occupant turned of the internal light when not serving to allow a better view of the action.

But what action it was. Watching Ashby at Ratby last week revealed that they couldn’t defend, and they shipped another 4 completely avoidable goals. Even the dismissal of Williamson who managed to collect a booking for persistant infringement in the 28th minute, didn’t cramp Birstall’s style, although they did score a quite brilliant own goal to offer their hosts scant consolation.

Referee Rob Massey turned out to be the biggest personality on show. He had a fine game, but he told a lovely story to his linesmen as I jotted down the line ups. He’d just referreed a game at Repton Public school. He abandoned the game after 60 minutes after sending off 3 in 4 minutes! He also pointed out that Jeremy Clarkson is one of their most famous alumni!

Splodge!

17 Saturday Sep 2011

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Saturday 17th September 2011 ko 3.00pm

Wessex League Premier Division

FAREHAM TOWN 2 (Tambling 5 30)

ALRESFORD TOWN 1 (Bentley 77p)

Att 117

Entry £6

Programme £1.50

Tea £1

Chips (with sweet chilli sauce!) £1

Cheeseburger £2.20

There was one reason for me to visit Cam’s Alders today…Splodge, or to use the name on his passport, Paul Proctor. Splodge does a fine job doing Fareham’s programme and website, and although he’ll hate me for saying it, he’s one of those footballing heroes, you never hear about.

Not that the ground isn’t worthy of note, its spick and span, and the club are rather proud of their brand new floodlights. For the hopper its the stand that attracts, the elevation counteracting the remnants of a long removed running track. Its also boasts not a bar, but a nightclub, Club V, resplendent in mid-70’s Italian bad taste decor! Mind you, the faciltities are excellent.

Splodge also pointed out the man to watch, striker Robbie Tambling. He should be playing at a higher level, but he has an annoying habit, blacking out during the game.

No such dramas this afternoon, and Tambling scored two goals in 30 minutes, the second due to a horrendous goalkeeping error. I settled down to enjoy an easy home win, but Fareham stopped asking the correct questions.

I began to question my loyalties, the hopper in me hoped that Alresford would take advantage of Fareham’s defensive frailties, the mate of Splodge’s hoped otherwise. We both got our wish, of a fashion. Alresford converted a slightly dubious penalty, but that was the extent of the threat, and in the end the victory was easier than the scoreline suggests.

And this will be the shape of things to come for this season. I’d like to visit more of the clubs frequented by my mates. Any suggestion of where I should go next?

Cherries Red

17 Saturday Sep 2011

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Saturday 17th September 2011, ko 11am (but delayed 15 minutes)

Football League Youth Alliance South/West Division

OXFORD UNITED 1 (Morris 90)

AFC BOURNEMOUTH 1 (Zocchi 49)

Att 34 (h/c)

@ Rover Sports & Social Club, Romanway, Oxford

Entry FREE

Nothing for Sale

When, Rover Cowley folded mid-way through last season, my “I’ll do it later” attitude towards the ground looked rather stupid. I tried to tick off the ground for Rover Cowley in Sunday football (which isn’t really Rover Cowley) but that was played on an outside pitch.

I’m fortunate that Oxford United have taken on the place as their training centre, new buildings have and are being erected, and the place has beeen given a lick of paint. For this season at least all youth and ladies games will take place there.

With a cheeky double lined up the last thing I wanted was a delayed kickoff, but the Cherries minibus got lost in Cowley, blaming a dodgy postcode, I mean how hard to spot is a car works? Still 15 minutes was acceptable and the game was excellent

I really should watch more youth football. This was a good passing game, but perhaps mirroring the first XI United did everything BUT score. A lot was being made of a Wunderkid,  Jayden Stockley playing up front for Bournemouth but he was well marshaled by Long and Dormer, and by the end cut a disheartened figure.

Of course there’s a script for these kind of games, and Zocchi’s neat finish 12 yards out to the left, was right on message. United huffed and puffed, missing chance after chance, until midfielder Morris took an 18 yards punt. Keeper Chad Collins should have got his body behind it but a simple hand was not enough and the ball squirmed into the bottom left corner.

Cruel, but justice

Rat Trap

14 Wednesday Sep 2011

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Leicestershire Senior League Premier Division

RATBY SPORTS 4 (McKenzie 4 83 Jacquei 49 Brightmore 57)

ASHBY IVANHOE 4 (Pollard 15 Bray 43 Netter 69 Gibson 72)

Att 23 (h/c)

Entry £3

Programme NO (this is Leicestershire remember!)

Can Diet Coke 50p

Very much an evening of contrasts, even down to the village itself. A pretty village yes, but showing obvious signs of dereliction. Desford Road, is similar, tucked away neatly behind the cricket ground, has a brand new clubhouse, but it’s half finished,  there’s a solidly built stand, but there’s no seats and there’s signs of a fire at its back. The Junior pitch is perfect but the adult version is badly cut and lumpy. There’s even signs of a terrace, sadly overgrown.

I’d picked the game, and as a goal whoring exercise, Ratby having shipped a hatful even at this early stage of the season, but it didn’t quite turn out how I expected.

Ashby should have won this at at a canter, but to my delight and doubtlessly the annoyance of the teams’ management, it turned into an exercise into who had the least competant defence! The highlight? Bray’s excellent finish for the 3rd goal, past his own keeper! Great stuff, and a good tick.

Daylight Robbery

14 Wednesday Sep 2011

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Cheltenham Association Football League Division Two

NORTHWAY 2 (33 89)

PRESTBURY 1 (59)

Att 25

Entry FREE

Nothing for Sale

They say that God helps those who help themselves (so why do shoplifters get arrested?) and my blasting through the countryside of Oxfordshire and Gloucestershire, was rewarded when I arrived 15 minutes late for a 6.00pm kick off when Referee Mike Lytheer arrived late and kick off was delayed until 6.25! Handy, we did get 90 minutes in, but it was mighty dark at the end!

Northway is a village just the other side of the M5 from Tewkesbury, although it looks less a village and more an industrial estate. Nothing too preposessing about the Gould Playing Field either, barely a tree to photograph, the only point of even minimal interest was the BMX equipment nearby.

Still all the ground ticks are the same size, even if the standard was poor and the first half instantly forgetable! In the gloom, Prestbury hit the crossbar, Northway counter-attacked and scored. But that’s something you can see at a far higher level!

The Apprentice

10 Saturday Sep 2011

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League 2

OXFORD UNITED 2 (Potter 45 Leven 52)

BURTON ALBION 2 (Richards 54p 66)

Att 8,043 (260 away)

I’m not going to blog every single OUFC home game, as you can only take so many pictures of the one ground, and after all this is a groundhopping blog!

What made this game different from every other League 2 fixture was that is was Bridle “Bonanza” day, when the club’s main sponsor put on entertainment prior to the game, giving me plenty to point my camera at!

As for the game, if all the patrons made a decision on whether to attend on the quality of the entertainment on offer, then the next home game will be a sell-out. This was a high quality encounter, with plenty of controversy. Should Burton have a a penalty in the first half, probably yes, but was the penalty given justified?  Probably not. Certainly former OUFC striker Justin Richards’ goading of the fans was infantile, but OUFC 2 up and cruising should never have given him the opportunity.

The game could easilty have gone either way, but the joyous scenes in the away end, spoke volumes, as much in fact as the locked home dressing room afterwards.

A great game for the neutral then, but how many of them were in the ground?

The Mickey Mouse Quotient

09 Friday Sep 2011

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Cheltenham Association Football League Division 2

TEWKESBURY TOWN 4 (Jordan 15 57 Halling 55 75)

NORTHWAY 1 (Higgins 24)

Att 47 (h/c)

Entry FREE

Nothing for Sale

Many groundhoppers have standards of football beyond which they won’t venture, a favourite measure is whether a programme is available. For others it’s a specific level, measurable by how many promotions it would theoretically take to reach the Football League.

As a result the Cheltenham League is off the beaten track for many, and it’s generally difficult to sell a game on a pitch behind a school, with no cover, and no facilities.  For all of these perceived difficulties this was an enjoyable evening out. It helped that the club were kind enough to phone me to offer directions and both sides gave information about the lineups and themselves freely. It was handy for the neutral also, that the two sides are local rivals, hate each other, and the two benches spent the encounter glowering at each other from opposite sides of the pitch. A division 4 game was taking place on the adjoining pitch to add more flavour.

So what was it like? Well the standard was predictably poor, but I’ve seen a lot worse, and at a far higher level, but it was always entertaining. We had the unusual sight of Northway’s Steve Prosser being booked for dissent, whilst a non playing substitute, but his side’s defence was notably more incompetent than their opponents’ and in  the second half the home side made that implied advantage count.

Walk on manhole covers

07 Wednesday Sep 2011

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United Counties League Premier Division

YAXLEY 0

PETERBOROUGH NORTHERN STAR 1 (Viera 79)

Entry £6

Programme £1

Yearbook £5

Yaxley, a small village near Peterborough has managed to avoid my attendance for far too long, and for no good reason. Whilst Leading Drove is hardly iconic, it is quirky, the locals are friendly, and they are justifiably proud of their brand new clubhouse and changing room block. That for the hopper is a cleft stick. Yes, the facilities are excellent, but it will mean that in time the quirks will gradually disappear. These include the club shop, PA box, and gatebox all rolled into one, the two cycle shelter stands and the hard standing which is in fact a series of concrete manhole covers! For me, its the quirks that attract me in the first place.

The game wasn’t quite as bad as the low scoreline would indicate. PNS should have won by far more, but it was a passing game, easy on the eye, and it was a pleasure to while away the time with James Rennie, an expert on this part of the world.

Another bonus is that opposite Leading Drove is the pitch used by Stilton FC, that’s my card marked!