Tag Archives: Football

The C Word

23 Monday Apr 2012

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Monday 23rd April 2012 ko 6.15pm

Reading League Senior Division

MORTIMER 2 (Chowdhary 5 Davies 60) Chowdhary sent off 25 (2nd booking)

PARK UNITED 2 (Tungy 10p Bickerton 32)

Att 37 (h/c)

Entry FREE

No Programme (old copy FREE)

Tea-in-a-mug 50p

I occasionally get asked what the aim of this blog is. For a time I’d say that there wasn’t one, but now I suppose its to answer the question, “Why would I want to visit there?” With what I saw tonight, you may find answering that question difficult.

Mortimer, just south of Reading is in fact Mortimer Common. You are very much in commuter belt, and expensive commuter belt at that. The village is named after the family of the same name, the most famous of whom, Roger de Mortimer, 1st Earl of March was for three years de facto ruler of England after leading a successful rebellion against Edward II, before being overthrown and executed in 1330 by Edward III, with his lands (including Mortimer) seized by the crown.

The Alfred Palmer Memorial Playing Field is to be found on the outskirts, and for its level, Step 7, is reasonable well-appointed. There’s a small clubhouse and bar, and the pitch is enclosed on three sites with what appears to be schoolyard metal fencing. The administration staff were notably friendly.

On the pitch, with Mortimer third and with a shout of the championship against Park United struggling, second from bottom, it looked like a home banker. Add to that that despite being from the next village along Burghfield Common, Park struggled to get 11 players there for kick-off. It was therefore no great surprise when Mortimer took the lead, Kaser Chowdhary finishing well from the left side of the 6 yard box.

It was in the 10th minute when the whole complexion of the game, and the 4 neutrals there’s evening changed. A Park forward was clean through and was taken out by goalkeeper Stuart Gosby. For me it was out of the box but a penalty was awarded by referee David Jewell , but Gosby was extremely fortunate to stay on the pitch as it looked to be a clear goalscoring opportunity. Whatever the facts of the matter, Chowhary was booked for dissent, before Ahmet Tungy tucked away the penalty.

What followed was utterly unacceptable. A diatribe of the ugliest possible language from the home bench resulted in the dismissal of Mortimer assistant manager Dave Hobbs. That seemed to involve him standing about a foot further back, and he and his colleagues continuing to hurl foul mouthed abuse at the officials. I’m certainly not prudish when it comes to swearing, but this was far beyond what an official should have to put up with.

It got worse on 25 minutes when Chowdhary went down rather easily in the box, and collected his second booking for diving. The bench went mad, and the term “Cheat,” was being hurled about freely. I can live with swearing but the club officials calling referees cheats is completely unacceptable. If I’d have been in charge, I’d have been tempted to have abandoned the game there and then.

As it was, the game took on a whole new slant when Ed Bickerton rifled home to give the visitors and unlikely lead. They held on quite comfortably until half time when we were treated to the Mortimer manager John Davies marching on to the pitch to confront the officials. As they home players trooped off one was heard to comment ” For f***s sake lads play the opposition, not the ref,” If only the management had taken heed.

It was a similar story in the second half, with the abuse eminating from the home dugout, and Mortimer having the lions share of possession but only managing an equaliser for all their superiority, Mike Davies firing home from 5 yards out. Manager Davies was soon dismissed for calling long-suffering Jewell a, “F*cking cheat,” again and gave an interesting insight on his priorities when a player complained about the latest dismissal. “Don’t f*cking shout at him, that’s my job,” before trudging away.

The fact that it finished 2-2 seemed utterly irrelevant at the final whistle. So lets revisit my earlier question, “Why would you want to visit Mortimer?” The answer sadly, is do so, but only when there’s a change of football management. I would refer those two to the poster I saw in the clubhouse at half time.

Gimme Shelter

19 Thursday Apr 2012

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Thursday 19th April 2012 ko 6.15pm

North Bucks & District League Division Two

UNIVERSITY OF BUCKINGHAM 0

CITY COLTS RESERVES 3 (Horwood 41 Chapman 45 Hinkley 51)

Att 16 (h/c)

Entry FREE

Nothing for sale

I suppose the first point to note is that the University’s playing fields aren’t in fact in Buckingham. They’re about 1.5 miles southwest, just outside of Gawcott, a village whose claim to fame is that it’s the birthplace of architect Sir George Gilbert Scott. He designed many iconic buildings in the UK. Amongst these are the Midland Grand Hotel by St Pancras Station in London, and Martyrs’ Memorial in Oxford. His grandson Giles Gilbert Scott designed Liverpool’s Anglican Cathedral and famously the red “K6” British phone box!

The North Bucks & District League in theory feeds into the Spartan South Midlands League, and is split into 4 divisions. There’s Senior, then Intermediate Divisions, followed by divisions 1, and 2. I expected therefore, to be watching a game on little more than a park pitch, what I got was much more interesting. Continue reading →

The Playoff for the Playoff

15 Sunday Apr 2012

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Saturday 14th April 2012 ko 3.00pm

League 2

OXFORD UNITED 0

GILLINGHAM 0

Att 7,322 (641 away)

Entry S/T

Programme £3 (inc Ox Mail)

At the end of my last Oxford United match report, I pondered whether U’s keeper Ryan Clarke would have got to the lob that gave Torquay a point on Monday, if he hadn’t been injured. Wayne Brown’s first league appearance of the season tells me that he probably would. Such is football.

This game meant a lot to both sides, United to stay in the play-off zone as they were equal on points with Crewe who were away at relegation haunted Macclesfield. For Gillingham a win was necessary to maintain a realistic hope of sneaking into the 7th spot held by United.

Unsurprisingly for United, Harry Worley made way for Michael Duberry returning from suspension, and equally logically Scott Rendell replaced James Constable in the starting line-up. The enigma that is Dean Morgan kept his place, on the left side of attack in a 4-4-3 formation.

And virtually every OUFC attack in that first half came from through balls behind Gills left back Andy Frampton, clearly deemed slow enough for Cristano Montano to beat for pace. The trouble was OUFC’s Achilles heel was also very much on show, inability to put the ball away.  There were no lack of chances at either end as Liam Davis’ fine flying block prevented Danny Kedwell taking the lead for the visitors, while Gills keeper Paulo Gazzaniga’s spectacular save kept out Asa Hall’s volley. The rebound fell kindly to Morgan, but Connor Essam’s block was the equal of Davis’ before.

There was a exchange of bookings for Oxford’s Jake Wright and Kedwell as things got a little feisty, but at half time the score reflected the fact that neither side could get the upper hand.

Nothing tactical changed form the start of the second half. Again Hall was unlucky not to be on the score sheet, as his goal bound volley was somehow headed off the line by Matt Fish. Pace was replaced by pace as Montano was switched for Oli Johnson, and one target man for another with Rendell being replaced by James Constable. It was Constable’s cross for Johnson that saw the latter’s shot again headed off the line by Essam.

The final chance saw Johnson go down in the box under a stiff challenge. Was it a penalty? I’ve seen plenty like that given, but for me he went down a little too theatrically, which may be why linesman Robert Ellis did not flag, and Johnson was booked for diving.

A game that United on another day would have one with Asa Hall getting a brace, but with Crewe only getting a point too, is as you were Cedric. Next Saturday its Oxford’s turn to visit a relegation threatened side, Plymouth Argyle.

Questions….and a few answers!

11 Wednesday Apr 2012

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Monday 9th April 2012 ko 3.00pm

League 2

OXFORD UNITED 2 (Chapman 59 Montano 68)

TORQUAY UNITED 2 (Howe 17 Atieno 90) Morris sent off 77 (2nd booking)

Att 7,867 (746 away)

Entry S/T

Programme £3 (inc Oxford Mail)

A few days on I’m still not sure what to make of this one. A draw against a side probably destined to gain promotion as runners-up is not to be sniffed at, and one I’d have settled for before the game. We did, after all managed to lose to struggling Northampton!

The first half performance by Oxford was sufficiently bad for me to have again, settled for a point. After a bright start, Harry Worley’s weak backpass that Rene Howe took full advantage of, to open the scoring signalled a listless performance neatly summed up by Oxford’s talisman James Constable. As hard working as ever, but utterly lacking in inspiration he was replaced at half time by Scott Rendell.

That changed the performance completely, although it was a fluke that got Oxford on level terms, Adam Chapman scoring direct from a corner! Has a player missing for a year due to a prison sentence ever been so popular? His return has felt like a bargain free transfer since the swindon game. Many failed to notice that it was his erudite pass that found Damian Batt on the right. His wonderful cross was powerfully met by Montano who headed home. The negotiations with West Ham for his continued services will be more keen as a result.

Which leaves us the other loanee forward, Dean Morgan. Egomaniac or integral? Chris Wilder seems to think the latter, but there seems to be little evidence that he can produce the goals, that are missing through Tom Craddock’s injuries. On the present showing I’d be amazed if better alternatives aren’t available on the free transfer market.

For all of that OUFC went into injury time 2-1 up, was and were playing 10 men. Morris’ dismssal was an easy decision for the referee, but would he have still seen red, if he hadn’t already been booked? Did the referee take the easy option and save him a further 2 game ban? My feeling is that’s exactly what happened.

Would Torquay’s equaliser had gone in if Ryan Clarke hadn’t injured his side a few minutes earlier? It looked like an uncharacteristically poor piece of goalkeeping from Clarke, but is Wilder inclined to throw in Wayne Brown who’s sole appearance this season resulted in a red card in a Football League Trophy game.

So many questions, and at one point I looked behind me and saw 5 potential first teamers in Darrell’s PA box, so many players but so few it seems capable of getting Oxford United into League 1. Who’d be a manager!

 

The Barnsley Chop

10 Tuesday Apr 2012

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Saturday 7th April 2012 ko 7.45pm

Northern Counties East League Division One

WORSBROUGH BRIDGE ATHLETIC 4 (Goff 52 Copping 67 Ruthven 72 Young 76)

ROSSINGTON MAIN 0

Att 273

Entry & Programme Hop Ticket

Badge £3

So, 8 games in, one to go, and quite honestly I was frazzled. Yes, I know I devised this year’s format, and I’ve no regrets, it helped generate good attendances for all the clubs and that makes for a good pay-day for them. But as the coach pulled into the outskirts of Barnsley I needed a lift. That I got as soon as I saw the Park Road ground. We parked at the other side of the bridge on the A61 and walked across, and …..wow! What a ground, with the stand with a girder cross beam, and the floodlights either side close together, to accommodate the cricket pitch beyond the far goal.

The club did a roaring trade in the kitchen, so much so that after the game the cook told me she’d had to despatch someone off to Asda to buy more chips, when they discovered that was closed, they had to go to the Tesco in Barnsley itself to get the much-needed supplies! Godfrey the bus driver by this stage had long since worked out that his ticket allowed him hospitality. I found him with a piece of cake and a cup of tea well before I got mine at half time. The club were mighty proud of the pork pie on offer, which reminded me of a visit to another local club, Stocksbridge Park Steels where I encountered exactly the same thing. Perhaps its a South Yorkshire tradition!

There was a huge array of programmes on sale and the club seemed to do well with a raffle, and once the crowd count was completed I was able to watch the second half from a raised point above the near goal. With Chris and I, were the two club’s officials and the NCEL committee. It was most gratifying that many hoppers came up to all of us and thanked us for our efforts. It was appreciated by all of us, and its was fun when the German contingent came for a chat and the Worsbrough secretary found it hard to believe that someone would travel all that way to visit his club!

His footballers didn’t let him down either, running in four second half goals to put their visitors to the sword. My only issue was that the goals were in the far goal and the numbers of the Worsbrough shirts were difficult to read. So if your scorers differ to mine then I apologise, but these do come from the League website!

With the game drawing to a close we thanked the clubs for their efforts. We also thanked Dave Morrall, Karl Blackburn and Brian Gould of the NCEL. I hope we gave you the hop you were looking for. After returning to the hotel I gave two hoppers a lift to another hotel, then set off back for Oxford on the M1, in utter silence, contemplating what had been achieved.

Gentlemen No Swearing Please

10 Tuesday Apr 2012

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Saturday 7th April 2012 ko 4.45pm

Northern Counties East Division One

HALLAM 1 (Getliff 88)

TEVERSAL 0

Att 212

Entry & Programme Hop Ticket

150 year brochure FREE

When we put this hop together there was one ground that loomed large, Hallam’s Sandygate, as it’s the oldest football ground in the world, and the club the second oldest behind Dronfield based Sheffield FC. On the coach we were a little nervous about how long we would need to cross Sheffield, but the traffic was kind and we reached S10 in plenty of time.

The first ever challenge match at Sandygate took place against Sheffield FC, on Boxing Day 1860. This is still believed to be the first ever inter-club game. The club also holds the Youdan Cup named after a local football enthusiast Thomas Youdan. This is believed to have been the first cup competition and the oldest football trophy in the world which remains the property of the club as it was won outright by Hallam in 1871. Although lost for a number years it was bought back from a Scottish antique dealer in 1997.

The club understandably trades on its “Oldest Ground status,” but the visit of the hop was also the start of something new for the club. Having been left a sizable bequest from a fan, the club have built an impressive new clubhouse, complete with some impressive signed shirts! This game was to be its opening bow. Although this was my second visit to the ground, the thing I’d forgotten was just how steep the slope is! So steep is it that our conversation soon turned to comparisons with the infamous slope at Chard. That slope for those who haven’t been, is far more acute than here, and is frankly jaw-dropping.

I’d got the impression from NCEL officials that the club might struggle with the hop crowd. I had to sort out getting a team sheet pinned up somewhere prominent, and the club were surprised that Chris and I would do the crowd count. Both were in the notes to clubs, but were easily sorted out. I was disappointed that the club quickly ran out of badges, but the 150 years brochure was a nice touch and made up for a poor programme. All in all, the club coped reasonably well with the crowd, and our coach driver Godfrey was pleased at the excellent hospitality he received.

I spoke to the Hallam officials prior to kick off and they didn’t seem at all confident at their team’s chances. Right from kick off in became obvious why. Hallam played with absolutely no confidence, and unfortunately for the neutrals, Teversal soon became sucked into the malaise. The game was the quintessential nil-nil bore draw until, with the hoppers beginning to move towards the exit, Craig Getliff rifled in from just outside the box. A stunning strike utterly out of step with the rest of the game, but a goal’s and goal and we continue.

The Hangover

10 Tuesday Apr 2012

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Saturday 7th April 2012 ko 1.30pm

Northern Counties East League Premier Division

STAVELEY MINERS WELFARE 0

PICKERING TOWN 1 (Parker 74)

Att 270

For our next game we travelled south on the M1 to Derbyshire, and Staveley in the borough of Chesterfield, famous for its crooked church spire. If Maltby was a typical colliery town, stark in its industry, then Staveley with a similar background seems to have moved away from its heritage. We passed the site of the Markham Colliery now a country park with lake, the only clue to its past being the pit wheel mounted in concrete.

There’s obvious regeneration going on at Staveley MW’s ground Inkersall Road. I visited for a NCEL Division 1 game about 5 years ago and liked the place. When I’d gone back two days previously to collect the programmes, I barely recognised the stadium. The Baris group, who specialise in facades and linings, and their chairman Terry Damms sponsor the League and club, and have been responsible for an almost complete rebuild of the ground. The idea was to bring the ground up to Northern Premier League standards, but such has been the progress that by my reckoning its close to Conference standards! Its worth commenting that Baris were kind enough to sponsor this year’s NCEL hop.

There was never any doubt that the club would be able to cope with a crowd. In fact the previous week they’d attracted a crowd of 1,050 for their FA Vase semi-final second leg vs Dunston UTS. In charge of catering is Ele Reaney, who’d impressed Chris with her food at the Dunston game, and once again the club pulled out all the stops, and I have to say the chicken curry and chips were delicious. There was the biggest programme stall I have ever seen, you could could get your picture taken with replicas of the World, European, Premiership and FA Cups, and a wide range of clothing (even in “Hopper” size) was on sale.

The problem was that Staveley had lost that FA Vase tie in heartbreaking circumstances, and they were having a massive hangover about it. What for all the world looked like a home banker proved to be  a turgid game of few chances. It looked for all the world to be a nil-nil draw until subsitute Russell Parker popped up for the Pikes to fire home as the clock ran down. Staveley huffed but they looked a tired and toothless team. Promotion on this showing looks unlikely, despite the efforts of Staveley’s many volunteers and supporters.

That said the hoppers climbed back on the coach marvelling at how such a well appointed ground could be hosting step 5 football.

One signpost only

09 Monday Apr 2012

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Friday 6th April 2012 ko 4.45pm

Northern Counties East League Premier Division

LIVERSEDGE 0

ARNOLD TOWN 1 (Burton 43)

Att 317

Entry & Programme Hop Ticket

Badge £3

The village of Liversedge lies between Cleckheaton and Heckmondwike in the Spen Valley near Bradford. In 1812 it was the scene of a Luddite riot at Rawfolds Mill when the local weavers attacked Edmund Cartwright who was in the process of developing his new power loom. So dominated by its suroundings the village, that apparently there’s only one signpost directing you here. Continue reading →

The Idle Working Men’s Club

08 Sunday Apr 2012

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Friday 6th April 2012 ko 1.45pm

Northern Counties East League Premier Division

THACKLEY 1 (Mallinson 84)

LONG EATON UNITED 1 (Chambers 26)

Att 327

Entry & Programme Hop Ticket

Badge £3

Copy of Jack Charlton’s autobiography £3

Team Sheet 20p

It really was a very shot drive across Bradford to Thackley, in fact we had enough time to call in at the Idle Working Men’s Club! The name is a simple pun as the club is in the district of, yes Idle!

Despite the Bradford address Dennyfield has a rural feel to it, it even has a stables at one end! The club once again had read their notes, and were ready for the descending hoppers! This time the food of choice was a delicious chilli-con-carne with rice which seemed to be very popular. The club ran a bookstall in aid of “Help for Heroes” which I thought was a nice touch, and again the club’s big day went like clockwork.

I took a few minutes to have a look around. I soon found well-loved hopper Derek Coope having a doze in the clubhouse. No hop is quite the same without Deadly, a retired professor of mathematics. He’s not in the best of health these days, and I doubt his doctor would approve of him going groundhopping but its obvious what a lift these weekends give him. What he probably doesn’t know if how much his presence lifts everyone else!

The ground would grace a much higher level. There’s hard standing behind both goals and a large stand at the half way line. On the other side there’s a open terrace which the club are fundraising to convert to a second stand. Beyond the near goal there’s an intriguing tower structure. It turned out we were actually standing on top of a railway and the “Tower” is in fact a ventilation shaft!

The game for all the world looked a home banker as Long Eaton are struggling to maintain Premier Division status so when Danny Chambers fired United into the lead from a corner, and the visitors looked strong in defence a minor upset looked on the cards. I had my cup of tea with the officials at half time, none of which seemed unduly worried, apart from the vexed issue of consuming the delicious but hot soup and be out for the second half!

That seemed to be following a similar path to the first. Thackley attacked and Long Eaton defended, it wasn’t a wonderful spectacle but I found it gripping in a “Will they, won’t they” way. Thackley did equalise, Matt Morgan’s through ball into the box was seized on by John Mallinson, who from the tightest of angles on the right managed to find the net. That was the very least Thackley deserved, but it did leave one person slightly disappointed, Long Eaton resident Chris Berezai! Not sure the accent is quite Derbyshire though!

Here we go again!

08 Sunday Apr 2012

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Thursday 5th April 2012 ko 7.45pm

Northern Counties East League Division One

YORKSHIRE AMATEUR 1 (Craig Heard 45)

HEMSWORTH MINERS WELFARE 3 (Crapper 11 Williams 19 48)

Att 179

Entry & Programme Hop Ticket

Badge £3

“Leeds Pale” Bitter £2.50/pint

This was a long day! From Long Eaton, Chris and I set off for Staveley Miners Welfare to pick up 3 sets of programmes for the inaugural NCEL hop. From there it was further up the M1 to the Cedar Court Hotel in Wakefield, our HQ for the weekend. There we were joined by League Committee member Karl Blackburn with the other sets of programmes. It took around 90 minutes to put together the 100 or so programme packs for those who’d pre booked their tickets.

By that time it was around 1.30, so Chris and I started the shuttle runs to the various rail stations of Wakefield to pick up the public transport using hoppers. Included in that throng was the towering presence of Ari, the chairman of the Scarborough FC Norwegian supporters club, which has 60 members!

After a strong coffee, it was soon 5.45 and our coach, driven by Godfrey arrived. It took around an hour to reach Leeds and Bracken Edge, home of our first club Yorkshire Amateur. On the way we had a phone call from Central Midlands League Bonanza organiser Rob Hornby to wish us luck. Considering that there’s friction between the CMFL and the NCEL it was a wonderful gesture from a class act.

From there on in it was a bit of a blur for an hour, as programme packs were distributed, friends reaquainted and officials met. It was a bit of a relief when we could all go and watch some football!

The “Ammers” are club with real history. They were founded in November 1918 but only began playing matches in 1919. In those early days, the club’s fixtures largely consisted of playing friendlies at Elland Road following the demise of Leeds City FC, on the orders of the Football Association, after irregularities were discovered in their accounts. However, in 1920 the club decided that the ground was not suitable for their needs and sold the lease to the newly formed Leeds United AFC for the sum of £250! They moved to their present headquarters at Bracken Edge in 1922 after using several other grounds, including sharing with Harrogate Town.  in 1932 a record crowd of 3,569 paid gate receipts of £160 to see the 5-2 Amateur Cup Quarter Final replay victory over Wimbledon. This was after a 2-2 draw at Plough Lane before a crowd of 12,000. The “Ammers” had demolished the holders, Wycombe Wanderers, 4-0 in the previous round but lost to Marine in the semi final.

Since then life has been a struggle, living in the shadow of the far bigger professional clubs in the area, but is a remarkably spick and span ground that sadly these days sees gates in the teens. For all that, the clubhouse has been refurbished and the club worked incredibly hard serving up hot food and specially purchased real ale to the hoppers.

On the pitch sad to say, Amateur were no match for their visitors from mid-way between Barnsley and Pontefract proved to be far too strong for their hosts. Ryan Williams was the pick of the players on show collecting a brace, but the scoreline could easily have been crueller on the hosts.

As organiser, I’d have liked to have seen a few more at the game, but given the appalling traffic on the M1 and on a working day, I’m probably just being hard to please. On the way out of the first ground on each hop, I’ve got into the habit of quietly listening to hoppers’ impressions of what they’ve just seen. They were all positive, so I allowed myself to breathe, and after returning to the hotel, we found a local boozer, with acting Fareham Town FC secretary Paul “Splodge” Proctor, and relaxed.